You fight. You don't want to, but, you do. You fight because of things she does that you don't like and things you do she doesn't like. Most case's they aren't even important. What's important after a lot of years you both still always do them. Habits overall are inextinguishable. Your fighting because your married, and fighting is as intrinsic to marriage as sex.
If you want to stay married, you don't have to stop fighting, you have to keep the fighting less personal. Most fights they are volatile, often imaginative, and always terribly personal. They are in other words what sex should be.
I think in the back of our minds when we argue, were thinking who's going to win? The question is not who can win, because anyone can win if they're wiling to win at the cost of love and hurt. The big question is who can abstain from winning, who can resist the temptation of winning, which like all marital temptation, is always there.
So how do you do that? Well you don't go to bed angry or in different rooms. And you try like hell not to say things that can't be unsaid or hard to take back. And NEVER end a fight by having sex with someone else other than each other, and that includes going on line and chatting or seeking out someone else because someone else don't know the real you like your spouse. Infidelity is the final measure of defeat and victory in the worst possible form. And most times you may never be able to recover from it.
Fighting is just another way of voicing your objections to the person you both chose to live out your life with. All things matter to marriage. Sex matters to marriage, fidelity matters to marriage, equal ground matters, and even fighting matters to marriage,.
What matters most to marriage? forgiveness, and forgiveness doesn't come free. You have to fight for it! So go kiss your spouse and think of whats most important to you as a couple.
If you want to stay married, you don't have to stop fighting, you have to keep the fighting less personal. Most fights they are volatile, often imaginative, and always terribly personal. They are in other words what sex should be.
I think in the back of our minds when we argue, were thinking who's going to win? The question is not who can win, because anyone can win if they're wiling to win at the cost of love and hurt. The big question is who can abstain from winning, who can resist the temptation of winning, which like all marital temptation, is always there.
So how do you do that? Well you don't go to bed angry or in different rooms. And you try like hell not to say things that can't be unsaid or hard to take back. And NEVER end a fight by having sex with someone else other than each other, and that includes going on line and chatting or seeking out someone else because someone else don't know the real you like your spouse. Infidelity is the final measure of defeat and victory in the worst possible form. And most times you may never be able to recover from it.
Fighting is just another way of voicing your objections to the person you both chose to live out your life with. All things matter to marriage. Sex matters to marriage, fidelity matters to marriage, equal ground matters, and even fighting matters to marriage,.
What matters most to marriage? forgiveness, and forgiveness doesn't come free. You have to fight for it! So go kiss your spouse and think of whats most important to you as a couple.
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